finding me

I layed awake thinking last night. "who am i really?" One, I know I am Gods creation. But, as Gods creation who am i supposed to be? Number one a christian. I think of my self as a servant of Christ. I am a mother and a wife.  I am a gardener, a crafter, a homemaker. I just still feel like i'm not doing enough serving. Doing a bible study right now, that I have done before called " No other gods".
We did this as a group at church a few years ago. Now, I am doing it by myself and still getting something from it.
I've known for years I was way to deep into my gardening, but not willing to give it up. I seem to dive head first into whatever "hobby" I am interested in and leave everything else behind. My gardening became my god. Now, I am trying to be careful, so this whole vintage collecting/house redecorating doesnt become my god. I need to find a balance with it all.
I thought for sure God was telling me having a small nursery at my home was what i needed to be doing. Yes, I did okay with it but it really never went anywhere. Why, I don't know and I may never know. Oh well, as my boss says 400 times a day. I've decided to let the little nursery go and move on. I am at peace with that. I will definitly still garden but not with the" garden or die attitude."  I had also made my dieting a god in my life. let it go!

I don't know where all this seriousness came from. I just am curious what my next steps will be. Where my God is leading me. How long do I have to wait to find out whats next. Or just roll with it and be patient and just enjoy the ride. Where can i serve? I work with the high school girls at church and i'm on the building and grounds committee and i help with VBS, but something is still missing. Like this is not enough. Maybe our disaster team will be called to North Carolina for relief work after hurricane Irene. well, i guess we will see.